| The quality of one's life to a large extent is | | | | emotions, hormonal flow, digestion, body clock, |
| determined by the quality of our relationships with | | | | and even the structure of our brains. Without |
| others. When we feel we have no choice but to | | | | conscious direction and without the need to think, |
| face the world alone, we suffer emotionally, | | | | our nervous systems are always learning from |
| physically, and spiritually, and no degree of | | | | and adapting to our interactions with the nervous |
| outward success can replace or repair the lonely | | | | systems of others. Not all that surprising once |
| feeling in our heart. No matter how talented, | | | | you think about it. At the very least, for millions |
| wealthy, or trim and fit we might appear to be, | | | | of years mammals have had the need to intuit |
| without supportive relationships it is a difficult | | | | which other mammals are safe, and which are |
| challenge for any one of us to maintain physical | | | | predators. As mammals we have a |
| and emotional health. Children, pets, loved ones, | | | | limbic-emotional connection with each other that |
| mentors, colleagues, and teachers, can all help us | | | | leads to procreation and family structures, and |
| fulfill our need for connection to other sentient, | | | | these relationships do not necessarily require the |
| limbic beings. | | | | capacity to think, analyze, or rationalize. Emotional |
| Our nervous system is an "open loop learning | | | | understanding of our self, others, and our |
| system" that draws on energetic connections with | | | | relationships, comes prior to thinking. |
| others in order to continually adapt and hopefully | | | | We can easily find numerous examples of the |
| flourish. This concept of "open loop learning" is | | | | importance of supportive limbic-emotional contact |
| very much a part of the theory of Aikido. When | | | | with others. It is fascinating to note that baby |
| being attacked in an Aikido class we are hoping to | | | | monkeys who have lost their mothers at an early |
| move towards "joining with" our adversary and | | | | age, not only wind up with various developmental |
| creating the energetic connection that can lead | | | | problems, but they also find it hard to live |
| towards stabilization of both parties emotions, and | | | | successfully with the rest of their community. The |
| a sense of physical and emotional completion. We | | | | same tends to be true for children forced to |
| come to understand each attack as a physical | | | | grow up in harsh, sterile conditions. Indeed with |
| expression of loneliness and alienation, and the | | | | children growing up in orphanages that show little |
| desire for connection. A sense of separation from | | | | in the way of human contact and emotional |
| others leads to fear, and fear can easily lead to | | | | bonding, the mortality rate of the children is |
| feeling like you are about to be attacked, and | | | | dreadfully high. High quality health and emotional |
| thus attacking others preemptively. In Aikido we | | | | well-being requires supportive limbic relationships. |
| gain a direct understanding of how a physically | | | | Our nervous system needs to locate and be |
| and emotionally healthy person requires ongoing | | | | nurtured by other nervous systems in order for |
| enrichment, stabilization, and support from the | | | | us to have a sense of stability and completion. A |
| nervous systems of others. | | | | limbic connection with others helps us to develop |
| When we talk about the interaction of nervous | | | | a deeper sense of safety, calmness, and dignity. |
| systems amongst mammals, we are pointing to | | | | Our need to live our life in supportive limbic |
| the fact that the nervous systems of two people | | | | relationships is very much a wonderful fact of life, |
| in relationship very definitely communicate with, | | | | and not at all a weakness to be overcome. As |
| inform, and change each other. Our emotional | | | | mammals we all require "a little help from our |
| connection with others clearly affects our moods, | | | | friends. |